My Studio. My Life. My Mess. My Now.

This my friends is an honest and up-to-date look at my studio.

There is nothing pretty about it.

It’s basically piles upon piles and mess upon mess.

And it’s suffocating me.

Period.  End of story.

My desk is the worse.

I mean seriously.  Look at that.

A microphone?  A prayer bundle?  A hole puncher?  And a hair brush?!?

Have you seen my hair lately?  Not hair brush material!

So what’s up with that.

This area is where I usually keep my palette and brushes.

Now it’s become junk pile central.

(Not saying that stuff is junk by any means…but you know what I mean.)

Than there’s this stupid thing taking up major space in my studio.

What was I thinking when I purchased that metal contraption?

It’s ugly.  It reminds me of being back in the walk in freezer of many of the restaurants
I used to work at in my twenties.

On top of it, who wants to see all that crap while they are creating anyways?

Not me anymore!

Then this.

This is unforgivable.  This is simply pure laziness.

We won’t even go there about this stuff.

But, there you got it.

A true, up-to-date, honest look inside my studio.

Why am I doing this?  Why am I hanging my dirty laundry out for everyone to see?

First and foremost, because this is real life baby.

This is really what things look like behind the scenes here at Dirty Footprints Studio.

More than that–this mess is an outside reflection of what the inner landscape of my life has been looking like a lot this past year.  Just one pile of mess after another of:

Things that don’t belong together.

Things hanging around that no longer serve my greatest good.

Things just there because I’m too lazy to take care of them–or maybe it’s just been easier to ignore them altogether.

Things that I used to love, but grew out of.

Things that were given to me–that I never asked for or even wanted in the first place–but for some ridiculous reason was afraid of hurting people’s feelings–so I’ve just kept the shit around.

Things that I purchased because I thought “one day I would need them”.

Things that aren’t even mine–that other people have dumped here.

Things that I once created, but no longer represent who I am today.

So many freaking things.

Things, that when I finally stepped away for awhile, I realized are suffocating me.

Burying me.

Keeping me from truly moving forward and shining my big bright amazing light.

So this is it.

I’m done.  I’m sick and tired of the mess,
the piles,
and the pretending it’s not there.

I’m tired of all these things taking up my space.

More than ever,
I am 100% ready for a change.
A real change.
I’m talking on a molecular level and
then coming in and sweeping through
each and every one of my blessed koshas.

I’m taling about lets get down and dirty kind of change.
A no holds barred kind of change.
A piss off everyone–
take no prisoners–
LET’S DO THIS! kind of change.

I’m talking about jumping on Kali’s back and throwing things into the fire kind of change.

So yes, the real reason why I’m showing you this big ol’ mess is
Because this is my truth.

This is where I’m at.

In my studio.
My life.
My business.
My creativity.

But most of all, BECAUSE THIS IS WHERE IT BEGINS.

This is where I am learning to let go.
To trust.
To open up to SPACE and MIRACLES and POSSIBILITIES that I can not even dream of yet.

This is where I finally say YES!

YES to my life.
YES to what I’m here to offer to this world.
YES to what I want to create–and how I want to create it–and what I say feels right to me.

YES to my vision on how life is suppose to be.

YES. YES. YES.